Show notes
In this episode, my guest is Bill Eddy, a lawyer, licensed therapist, professional mediator, and faculty member at the Pepperdine University School of Law. He specializes in identifying, reducing friction with, and disentangling from high-conflict individuals. We explain how high-conflict personalities differ from personality disorders and examine the cycles of blame and drama that cause persistent conflict in their relationships.We discuss how to quickly recognize high-conflict individuals based on specific criteria and behaviors, helping listeners learn to spot their less obvious tactics. You’ll also learn how to disengage from them with minimal friction and understand the methods they use to draw people back in or keep conflict alive.Additionally, we cover effective communication strategies for mediating situations involving high-conflict individuals, emphasizing empathy and problem-solving approaches. This episode equips listeners with tools to navigate conflict in various contexts, promoting resolutions that benefit all parties involved.Read the episode show notes at hubermanlab.com.Thank you to our sponsorsAG1: https://drinkag1.com/hubermanMaui Nui Venison: https://mauinuivenison.com/huberman ExpressVPN: https://expressvpn.com/huberman Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman David Protein: https://davidprotein.com/huberman Timestamps00:00:00 Bill Eddy00:02:58 Sponsors: Maui Nui & ExpressVPN00:06:41 High-Conflict Families, High-Conflict Individuals & Patterns00:10:48 Personality Disorders, Prevalence & Overlap00:18:28 High-Conflict Personality vs. Personality Disorders, Blame00:24:33 High-Conflict Individuals, Tool: First-Year Rule & Commitment00:30:53 Sponsor: AG100:32:05 Relationship Stability, Tool: Vetting Potential Partners00:38:54 Heightened Emotions, Negative Advocates, Divorce00:47:50 Brain, Plasticity & Fear; Bullies, Polarization00:54:51 Sponsors: Function & David00:58:00 Emotions, Media, Politics01:04:57 Tool: WEB Method, Identify High-Conflict Individuals01:12:20 Body Cues, Identify High-Conflict Individuals01:18:40 Tool: Don’t Label & Empathy; Adapting Your Behavior01:23:12 High Conflict Personalities & Occupations01:28:18 Big Personalities: Evidence vs Assumptions01:37:27 Tool: Leaving a Combative High-Conflict Individual, Blame, Gradual Exit 01:45:41 Exiting a High Conflict Relationship & Timing01:49:27 Tool: Disentangling from a Victim High-Conflict Individual, “Hoovering” 01:52:32 High Conflict Divorce, Small Families & Parental Estrangement 01:57:01 Tool: Managing Emotions & Relationships, EAR Statements01:59:52 Large Families & Conflict Resolution02:04:11 Bullies & Online Social Groups 02:09:18 Personality Disorders, Causes, Culture02:13:09 Tool: 4 “Fuhgeddaboudits”, Topics to Avoid in High Conflict Resolution02:19:50 Tool: CARS Method, Connecting & EAR Statements, Analyzing02:27:03 Tool: CARS Method, Responding & BIFF Response, Setting Limits & SLIC02:36:40 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network NewsletterDisclaimer & Disclosures Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices