This is episode 3 of a 4-part special series on mental health with Dr. Paul Conti, M.D., a psychiatrist who did his medical training at Stanford School of Medicine and residency at Harvard Medical School. He is the author of the book, “Trauma: The Invisible Epidemic.” Dr. Conti explains how to find, develop and strengthen healthy relationships — including romantic relationships, work and colleague relationships, and friendships. He explains a roadmap of the conscious and unconscious mind that can allow anyone to navigate conflicts better and set healthy boundaries in relationships. We also discuss common features of unhealthy relationships and clinically supported tools for dealing with relationship insecurity, excessive anxiety, past traumas, manipulation and abuse. Dr. Conti explains how, in healthy relationships, there emerges a dynamic of the mutually generative “us” and how to continually improve that dynamic. The next episode in this special series explores true self-care, which can be cultivated through a process of building self-awareness along with other important practices.  For the full show notes, visit hubermanlab.com.Thank you to our sponsorsAG1: https://drinkag1.com/hubermanBetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/hubermanWaking Up: https://wakingup.com/hubermanEight Sleep: https://eightsleep.com/hubermanMomentous: https://livemomentous.com/hubermanTimestamps

Build Healthy Relationships

Sponsors: BetterHelp & Waking Up

Healthiest Self in Relationships

Structure & Function of Self

Relationships, Levels of Emergence

Generative Drive in Relationships

Sponsor: AG1

Generative Drive, Aggressive Drive, Pleasure Drive

Romantic Relationships & Matched Generative Drives, Trauma Bonds

Generative Drive Expression, Libido, Giving & Taking

Sponsor: Eight Sleep

Generative Drive in Partnerships

Libido, Avoidance & Working through Barriers

Repeating Bad Relationship Patterns, Repetition Compulsion

Narcissism, Dependence, Attachment Insecurity

Abusive Relationships, Demoralization

Oppressors, Darkness, Hope & Change

Work Relationships, Oppression & Accountability

Jealousy vs. Envy, Narcissism

Power Dynamics in Relationships

Giving vs. Taking in Relationships

Transactions & Relationships; Family & Generative Drive; Flexibility

Relationships & Kindergarten

Anxiety in Relationships, Communication

The “Magic Bridge of the Us”

Mentalization, Getting into Another’s Mindset; Navigating Conflict

Healthy Boundaries

Self-Awareness, Mentalization

“Broken Compass” & Self Inquiry, “Map” Analogy